03 Aug I could never do that…until I did!
2 weeks ago five dirty words came out of my mouth that I had not heard for a long time, if ever. They were so foreign to me that I was shocked and even more so were my children. I said the words ‘I could never do that’!
We were driving along the motorway towards Byron Bay when an array of colourful parachutes peacefully floated past in the distance. We all strained our necks to watch them gently manoeuvre their way to a clearing not far from the road. Unlike many people skydiving has never been on my bucket list. Not because I was afraid (even though I most certainly was) but I just didn’t feel the need to face that fear. I had no interest in the experience or giving it a go. I was ok with it and had never given it more thought than that.
However, this time was different. This time I surprised myself by how quickly and decisively I said that I couldn’t do something. Could NOT. NEVER. I was telling myself and my children that I had a limit that I could not overcome in my lifetime. It hit me pretty quickly how big this was.
For the following week I could not stop thinking about this moment. I started to delve deeper into where this limit and fear was coming from. It didn’t take long to realise that this was not about heights or jumping out of a plane. Over the past 12 months I had noticed that I had become more afraid. Less risk averse (which is probably a good thing because I needed a little more aversion to risk) and much more careful. I looked in the mirror and saw someone who had so much in them but was holding back in business and in life.
There are lots of valid reasons as to why there had been this change in me but just because they are valid doesn’t mean I accept them. In my book, it is not ok to hold back due to fear…danger yes, fear no. Fear is just an emotion, it is not real which means it’s completely self-controlled. Now you may disagree, and say that it’s dangerous jumping out of a plane but we all know its riskier driving a car everyday! Let’s not go down that path right now as this experience actually has nothing to do with skydiving.
I needed a pattern interrupt and I needed one quick! I needed to do something that I said I could never do to show that the limits I had set for myself in business and life were not real and more importantly were erasable. The activity itself was irrelevant, although it was always going to have a bigger impact the more extreme it was!
I have always said that we only have one life, and life is too short and too long. It is too short to hold back, and it is too long to live not really living. This was about recognising that I wasn’t giving my all and then creating a ceremony of sorts to change that. A ceremony that would open up another world of possibility and potential from here on in. So I jumped!
In a matter of 10 minutes I went from being someone who never could, to someone who did!